Unterschiedliche Nationalitäten...

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 15:40:53 Titel: Unterschiedliche Nationalitäten...

The Italian says, "When I've a finished a makina da love withah my
wife, I go down and gently tickle the back of her knees, she floats 6
inches above a da bed in ecstacy."

The Frenchman replies, zat is noting, when Ah've finished making ze
love with ze wife, Ah kiss all ze way down her body, and zen Ah lick za
soles of her feet wiz mah tongue, and she floats 12 inches above ze bed
in pure ecstasy."

The redneck says, "That aint nothing. When I've finished porkin the ole
lady, I git out of bed, walk over to the winder and wipe my weener on
the curtains. She hits the freakin' ceiling."

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 15:43:12 Titel:

Thaz wy I don´sleep withe Rednecks Hau mich, ich bin der Frühling

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 15:45:25 Titel:

solangs nicht deine Vorhänge sind.......

aber trotzdem rotfl

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 15:48:07 Titel:

He he, wie geil!

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 15:59:04 Titel:

Redneckwitze sind die schönsten............ YES

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 16:02:37 Titel:

noch ein alter:

Obituary

A woman from Arkansas went into the local newspaper office to see that the obituary for her recently deceased husband is written.

The obit editor informed her that the fee for the obituary was 50 cents a word.

She paused, reflected and then said, "Well, then, let it read, 'Billy Bob died.'"

Amused at the woman's thrift, the editor said, "Sorry ma'am, there is a seven-word minimum on all obituaries."

Only a little flustered, she thought things over and in a few seconds said, "In that case, let it read,
'Billy Bob died - 1983 Pickup for sale.'"

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 16:03:13 Titel:

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 16:08:08 Titel:

...und noch ein gaaaannz alter aus meiner Sammlung:

Bubba died in a fire and his body was so badly burned that the morgue needed someone to I.D. the body. So they called up his two friends, Jim-Bob and Billy-Joe, to come and try to I.D. the body. Jim-Bob went in and the mortician pulled back the sheet, and Jim-Bob said, "Yeh, he's burnt prettybad. Roll him over." So the mortician rolled him over, and Jim-Bob looked at his ass and said, "No, dat ain't Bubba."

The mortician didn't say anything, but thought that was kind of strange. Then he brought in Billy-Joe to I.D. the body, and Billy-Joe looked at him and said, "Yeh, he's burnt real bad; roll him over." The mortician rolled him over, and Billy-joe looked down at his ass and said, "No, dat ain't Bubba."

The mortician said "How can you tell?"

Billy-Joe said, "Well, Bubba had two assholes."

"What? He had two assholes?!" said the mortician.

"Yeh, everyone in town knew he had two assholes. Every time the three of us went to town, everyone would say, 'Here comes Bubba with them two assholes!'"

Verfasst am: 28.09.2006 16:38:26 Titel:

nochen alter und dann erstmal ab nach Hause.....:

Farmer sent out for the vet, to see if old Bossie could be cured of her crossed eyes.

Vet took one look, took a long glass tube out of his black back, walked around behind the cow, lifted her tail, stuck the tube in, and blew in the tube really hard!

Well, old Bossie's eyes straightened right out after that. But, the vet told the farmer, "Bossies eyes ain't gonna stay straight, at first. You're gonna hafta to do this twice a day for the next week or so, 'till the old girls eyes stay straight!"

So, twice every day, the farmer took the glass tube, blew Bossies eyes out straight again. All went well for the first couple days, but right after supper on the third day, the farmer found that, as hard as he might blow, he could not get the cow's eyes to staighten out. Finally, after about ten tries, the farmer was gettin' pretty winded. So, he called his hired hand to help out.

"Jeb," he said, "I just can't get Bossie's eyes to uncross, no matter how hard I blow. Think you could give it a try?"

"OK," said Jeb. Jeb walked around behind the cow, pulled the tube out, switched it around 180 degrees, pushed it back in, and commenced to blow.

The farmer was a little bit startled by this, and asked, "Jeb, yuh damned fool! What did ya go and do that for?"

Jeb answered, "Well, yuh don't think I wanta get your germs, do ya?"

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